Every relationship has its own set of strengths and weaknesses. The biggest mistake you can make in a long distance relationship is to let phone conversations become boring because it’s only conversation that keeps you connected.
Breathing down the neck of your partner every relationship – whether separated by distance or not – requires that two individuals give each other enough space to grow.
However, when you have been away from each other for a long time, you might want to be clued into everything that your partner is doing – what he did over the weekend, who were the friends she went out with for shopping or what is for dinner tonight. While it is a good idea to be in touch on daily basis, prying too much into your partner’s routine or social life may put him or her off the relationship. Below are some things to take note of in a long distance relationship;
1. Taking Your Partner For Granted
While it is a mistake to nag your partner about his or her life away from you, it is equally fatal to take your lover for granted. It is a fact, that every relationship needs to be nurtured in order to blossom, but in a long distance relationship, it is especially crucial that you put in that extra bit of effort, to keep it going. Be creative in coming up with romantic ideas to spice up your relationship, even if it is separated by distance.
2. Making Allegations of Infidelity
Once the seeds of suspicion have been planted in your relationship, it is the beginning of the end. If you are suspicious of your partner’s co-workers, friends, flat mates and other social acquaintances, it means that you do not trust your partner wholeheartedly. Worse still, if you charge your partner with being unfaithful to you, without any concrete evidence, it means that the faith in your relationship has gone and every relationship –long distance or not – is bound to collapse without the foundation stone of trust.
3. Not Involving Your Partner In the Relationship
When the two of you are living separately, it is easy to fall into the habit of taking decisions on your own. But take care to involve you partner, in matters where you both are concerned. For instance, ask your lover what he or she thinks of a Caribbean cruise the next time you can be together. Or inform your partner before you make any changes to a joint bank or credit card account.
4. Not Being in Touch
Pick up your partner’s phone calls, even if it is to say that you’ll be calling back. Keep in touch with each other by phone, email and text messages. A good way of bridging the distance just a little, is to use a web cam, since this offers a way to visually communicate with each other in real time.
5. Appearing Insecure
If you are insecure about the people your partner is meeting while living away from you, then it is a sign, that you are not emotionally mature enough for a long distance relationship. If you keep nagging your partner about how miserable it is for the two of you and how the other couples have it so well, it is bound to upset him or her that you feel so miserable about the relationship. Instead, look at the positive side to a long-distance relationship and take heart, that a meeting after a period of absence will be that much sweeter.
6. Adopting a Wait-and-see Stance
Very often, couples living away from each other, do not believe that their relationship can work, but at the same time they are reluctant to let go of each other. If you keep sitting on the fence, waiting to see how things might turn out, remember that this is not a relationship at all and will get you nowhere.
7. Having An Affair Yourself
The biggest mistake is to look for a third person to fill in for your partner, when he or she is not around. By allowing an outsider to enter your life – however briefly – you are breaking the basic bond of mutual trust that holds two people together. This is not only cheating on your partner, but an indication that you do not believe in the relationship yourself.